Double Dud - Garlic Fish and Garlic Honey Cauliflower

Folks, I've seen a lot of firsts in my day (not my first movie in a theater though... can someone bring this up subtly to my mom? Subtlety is not my strong suit). But this is a first for my blog. A double dud night. I'm not sure if Pinterest was having a two-fer, but Mom tried to make two entirely new things in one night.

I tried tipping her off when I tried some raw cauliflower and then declared that I didn't like it. Just because she put it in the oven and then poured a sauce over it, there was no way it was going to get better. And I think we've already discussed that fish - any kind of fish - is a poor substitute for chicken. But she keeps trying. At least I'll give her that.

Here's what it looked like. I think we're catching on that there is one color pallet in our house. Can you even see the fish? Looks like chicken right? You're living in a den of lies!! The baking fish sent a smell through our house that Mom seemed to like and kept calling "gar-lick". This is a very funny word to say and then try to lick your sister's face.

This is not a blank stare into oblivion. This is me finally realizing that my foreseeable future is filled with my mom experimenting with food and always trying to satisfy Dad's need for "trying something new." I did, eventually, eat some plain rice, but it was a slow road friends.

Even the girl protested. I'm not sure if she's trying to tell Mom to stop in the name of love, or because it's hammer time. But either way, she didn't like this either... Except the rice. She ate that with both hands.

So here is the link to the fish. And here is the link to the cauliflower.

Mom and Dad seemed to like it, but keep in mind folks that it is NOT approved.

Eggplant Parm

I have this new deal. Right before dinner when the table is getting set, I like to loudly proclaim that I am going to eat all my food. This has no relation whatsoever as to what happens after we sit down to dinner. I just like saying it. Mom says, "You keep saying these words. I don't think it means what you think it means," in this funny accent. She's so weird.

So apparently this dinner got assembled after I was in bed the night before. There's a pattern here that is developing that involves cutting me out of the food assembly process and I don't like it one bit.

I mean, who even sampled this cheese before it was spread on my dinner? Not me. How can we trust that it's real cheese.

The girl ate some of hers.

Wait, what's that you're asking me? There's no picture of me eating this? That's right... there's no picture of it. That's because you can't take a picture of something that didn't happen. I didn't eat it. I didn't like it. (I know I didn't taste it, but I could tell by looking at it that I didn't like it).



So folks, this one was a dud. But if you have a Daddy that will ask for seconds like mine did, you can find the recipe here.

Hamburger Enchiladas

Remember when we had chicken enchiladas? Yeah, me too. Those were delicious. I didn't have the same warm feeling about these, even though mom told me they had hamburger in them. If there is so much hamburger, what are those little green things? It suspiciously looks like a vegetable. Apparently the recipe said that no one would notice all that keeny, but I did notice. And when Mom pulls a fast one on me like that, I get real suspicious. Plus, I didn't even get to help make any of this so how do I know it's not tainted.

So despite liking hamburger and cheese, two main ingredients in this one, I didn't want to eat any of it.

The girl was going to eat hers but when she noticed I wasn't going to eat mine she stopped. And hey, she had a blueberry to eat. Why couldn't I have a blueberry? Yeah sure I found that on the floor and put it on her tray, but I want one too, from the refrigerator. I was told no.

Whoops Mom forgot to take a picture of the finished product but here you go, it's a photo of some eaten stuff. Dad ate all his but he didn't ask for seconds. Looks like Mom is the only one that liked this one, which she says is too bad because it means we won't likely have it again.

Click here if you want to experiment on your own family.

Not approved

The other lost post - Lasagna Soup

I realized looking at this page that I've posted some of the recipes where Mom surprised us all and we liked it. Where's the duds? That woman has made me eat a LOT of duds over the past three years, so where are they?

Oh yeah, Mom doesn't like to take photo evidence of them. Well you know what I found:

See what she did there? She tried to give me two spoons to entice me to eat this and I wouldn't. It's called lasagna soup. And while I like lasagna, this was an abomination. First, the noodles were too big for me to get on my fork. See my fork mom? It's itty bitty. I can't spear a big noodle with it.

Also, the cream thing threw me off. And I know I was yelling for food for half an hour as you tried to add the cream and distract me from my tantrum, all it did was cool this sucker down. And then when you made me wait until it got to the proper soup temperature, I got hangrier. Then we sit down and it's too hot to eat. Cue tantrum.

Wow, this is painful reliving these memories. Anyway, the lesson is, I don't like soup. Too hot, too hard to eat. Mom's tried soups since then but usually soups with round disks of sausage cut into them and then she drains out my liquid so I'm basically having meat and bean salad. That's been okay, but really she should know by now. I don't like soup!

I'm not out to embarrass anyone by posting a link so just as a cautionary tale, when you see that enticing Pin and think "Oh my kids like lasagna, what a neat twist." Just stop. They will not like lasagna soup. Just make lasagna.